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Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Singin' in the library

I'm at the library. No particular reason, other than that I look kind of foxy today (See that, people who comment on my lack of self-esteem? See that?) and didn't want to just sit at home, putting it to waste. I'm in the far back, shoved into a little cubicle, beside two special needs men who are singing separate songs at hilariously loud, unlibrary-like levels. It's really cute and sweet. The man directly on my left is now reading aloud the title of every movie coming out this summer. "I want to see Star Trek!" he just proclaimed, punching the air triumphantly. I'm not kidding; this is adorable. Vastly superior to doing homework at the kitchen table.

Here's some fun news for the day: I forgot The Exboyfriend's birthday! I woke up frantically this morning, like Shit shit shit, I forgot his birthday! April 26th! Shit! Then I opened my eyes, exhaled deeply, and smiled like a madwoman. I forgot his birthday! That's a serious step on the road to recovery. I'm no longer pouring over a large plate of cheese fries with a soggy copy of He's Just Not That Into You. I've progressed all the way to forgetting his birthday and checking It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken out of the library, where I'm currently sitting on a chair from the 1970s that bares a suspicious maroon stain.

I'm home now, lacking people singing, creepy remnants of bodily fluids, and the fourteen dollars I'd accumulated in library fines. Who would have thought that the Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus Best of Both Worlds Tour DVD in 3D could take so much out of my pocket for being just a few months late? Note to self: return Miles to Go on time. I'm just kidding. I didn't take out the Miley Cyrus autobiography. ...It's on hold.

Anyway, I just saw a commercial for a contest Hershey's is holding to win a S'MORES PARTY with RASCAL FLATTS. Although I'm not the world's hugest Rascal Flatts fan, I saw them in concert once and it was awesome. I am, however, THE WORLD'S HUGEST S'MORES FAN. Someone go win that for me.

Sexy: Dessert sandwiches made of chocolate and melted marshmallows folded between two graham crackers. Oh, and men who eat them in mass quantities.
Unsexy: Having a personal corndog fryer in your home kitchen.

Weight: 138
Chipotle burritos this year: 14
Subscribers: 15,677
Days left of high school: 18

Bye, guys! See you (hopefully in both blog and video) tomorrow. <3

39 comments:

Sara said...

I believe I might be happy for you on an innaproperiate stalker level. So, just a warning, if you hear the bushes quivering around your house, it's me, shaking violently from the awesome radiating off the place. :) Good job, forgetting his birthday. I'm proud.

Johnny Rollerfeet said...

wait ... hank green loves corn dogs ... thegreenhead.com loves the Old Fashioned Corn Dog Maker ...

is hank green unsexy? or do we judge him by his character and not his actions?

Katy J said...

Good for you! :D

A.J. James Brooks said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
A.J. James Brooks said...

With out sounding too creepy, you will find very few people who don't think you are always foxy.

And I have not had Smores in ages... I am so craving them now... thank you.

Kristina from Kansas said...

Hayley-
I am very happy that you forgot his birthday. This has to be one of the first steps to getting over someone. BTW Does any library not have suspicious maroon stains on the furniture?

Christy said...

Operation win Hayley a S'mores party is now COMMENCING!

Weasleywanter said...

So I've been reading your blog for a while now, and normally i read and then proceed to X out of the page, sorry hayley!, but i couldnt resist commenting.

The corndog fryer? I bet its pretty damn sexy to Hank.
That's really all i had to say. See why I dont comment?

seurat2 said...

I'm sure the almost boyfriend is helping with the forgetting too, Glad you recognized the painfully evident foxiness that is you. Now, hold that thought.

Anonymous said...

How did you even find the Corn Dog Maker?

Rachel said...

Awesome Hayley, the road to recovery is a hard one. If it's any consolation, whenever I'm feeling down I just go on to fmylife.com. I really feel for those poor shlups, but it lifts my mood up significantly =)

Stay cool!

BrattyBunny said...

Its Called A Breakup Because Its Broken is WONDERFUL. I love it. I bought it after my ex and I split and it helped a lot. Now I have to read He's Just Not That Into You due to my bad luck :[

Sadly this year I didn't forget my ex's birthday... and his new girlfriend [who was my exbest friend] just msg'd me today, being a douche :D Maybe I need to re-read it...

Kayli said...

"I'm just kidding. I didn't take out the Miley Cyrus autobiography. ...It's on hold."

Oh Hayley, you are a woman after my own heart. With the thing about the library fines too. I always stack up ridiculous amounts.

Also, you are lovely and funny and I wish we could be friends. Hey, Ohio's only like two states away from me! I think, anyway. Wait, where's Illinois?...Don't be ridiculous, I'm an English major. English majors don't need to know geography!

becca87 said...

At least you're farther along than some of us on the exboyfriend front....meh. I'll get there eventually.

Also s'mores + Rascal Flatts = BEST COMBINATION EVER.
<3

Jesse said...

Don't you just love when you realize you've forgotten things about an ex? It feels so freakin' great.

I must agree with above commentors Johnny Rollerfeeand Weasleywanter,; don't let Hank hear you talking bad about personal corn dog fryers. :)

Katy said...

I fear that corndog link is a footroll designed to lure in Hank Green.

Just sayin'.

Carrie said...

Whoa, gotta disagree with you there. That personal corn dog fryer is the sexiest thing I've seen today.

Congrats on forgetting your ex-boyfriend's birthday!

alittlevoice said...

I have never had a corn dog... and I think I'm okay with that. :P. :D.
Your posts pretty much make my evenings... thanks :).
<3 J

Kaitlyn said...

S'MORES PARTY?!?!?! WOW!!!!

I used to host s'mores parties in my dorm room. I didn't know they're a real thing!

Hayley said...

ahh, the bliss that is getting to the point where you dont actually remember his birthday :) haha
thanks so much for keeping me entertained :)

Jordan said...

YAY for forgetting his birthday! But the s'mores thing is backtracking, isn't it? Wasn't s'mores, like, a thing? Or am I making that up...? Well, then again, sometimes sexy is sexy no matter WHICH boy is doing it, and it simply cannot be helped.

So SPEAKING OF WHICH:

Really, really sexy: Dancing with a boy who clearly can't dance, when you can't dance, so you're both allowed to be the awkward dorky white kids you are, and can laugh at yourselves. And then when he notices the water bottle people have been kicking around, he stops, picks it up, and goes to recycle it. And then comes back to dance more. And he's really hot.

Not that I'm being absurdly specific or that it happened or anything. =D.

VicMorrowsGhost said...

Foxy at the library?
I have an image of you, hair all fancy, evening gown, covered in diamonds, gliding up to the guy counter and whispering, "I believe you're holding something for me."

The guy falls of his chair.

Nicholas said...

Well... admittedly, "I" am the guy who sits in the library and sings. Or the train. Park bench. Whatever... I don't care if I get dirty looks, because I'm my mp3 player's bitch.

KateyMatey said...

I've never commented on your blog before...Hi :)

Forgetting his birthday...that's an imaginary high five right there.

Oh, and your library seems so much more interesting than mine.

playmesomething said...

ewww, corndogs. (love you though, hank!)

congrats on forgetting his birthday! i don't have any exes, but i do have an ex guy i used to be borderline infatuated with, and one year i... well, remembered and then forgot, until he fb messaged me "i can't have a happy birthday until carla wishes me one" and then i flipped several dozen shits, and... you know, this isn't quite comparable to your achievement (as in not at all) so i'm going to stop and just say congratulations again.

(i am making a conscious effort to complete my ellipses. ellipses? because i normally do the.. thing.)

i think the most i've accumulated in overdue library fines is about $25. every time i walk in there i imagine some sort of silent alarm going off and the librarians baring their fangs in the back room as they watch me browse from the television monitors.

Sara said...

I work at the middle school in my town for my senior project (basically a time when I get to leave all my non-AP classes to help out somewhere) and I saw that the library has your book! Go Hayley!

Bianca23 said...

Good for you that you've forgotten your ex his birthday! You shuld be very, very happy about that. It's an important step.

And you're always foxy! That may sound weird coming from a girl, but if a girl admits you're hot, then you know you are haha.

Kelsi said...

Someone want to explain to me what a graham cracker is? I'm a naive New Zealander, that's all. Anyway, go Hayley! You're always foxy =D

Leesa said...

The part about you forgetting ex-boyfriend's birthday was highlighted by a single's ad on the blog. Others may have seen a different ad, but this was nearly "makes me pee" funny. Nearly.

You write really well for someone on YouTube.

Aardvarks Rule said...

i disagree, i think having a personal corndog machine is extremely sexy.

Margo said...

a corndog fryer. i didn't think one existed... yech.

Benjarmin said...

My school library just has books on how to make planes fly and Ukraine. :(

Mary Kate(don't judge my name) said...

hayley, oh oh oh. if i could write a song... well then i would be talented. BUT if i could write a song about you... well then it would take eons. yes eons. because i can not possibly describe how amazingly awesome you are in a song or words. not even a picture (which i hear is worth a thousand words). so to further humiliate myself and get even more fan girly... i adore you and i wish to be like you when i get to be a senior in high school. or eighteen. whichever comes first. sorry for the long comment. i was just getting fan girly and couldnt hold it in any longer. thank you
and i am sad your blog of april is almost over. :(

Anonymous said...

corndogs...eew. very unsexy.
*shudders*

Emma said...

Hayley- have you ever heard heard the song "Breakin Up" by Rilo Kiley? It's a really good, not your typical "oh baby I miss you I love you, etc..." breakup song. There's a some live versions on YouTube.

This is the first time I've commented on your blog but I've been reading it since the start of BEDA. I always look forward to reading your blog. I hope you keep blogging even though today is the last day of April.

Karissa said...

I randomly decided to walk to the library with my best friend yesterday, too. It's all huge and new and lovely because my town built a new one, and they have a giant fake tree with little twinkly lights in the children's section. Why must the children's section always contain all of the best stuff?

And yeah, you definitely just called Hank Green's dream kitchen appliance unsexy.

TessaBessa said...

Did I ever get around to leaving a comment for you yet? The creepy 15-year old stranger who's been admiring first your videos on youtube for more than a year now and your blogs for April? If not, Hi,you inspire me.

But...April 26th? ...that's my birthday. What a shame, to share a birthday with an ex of an awesome person. Oh well...I also share it with one of my awesome friends.

Thanks for the blogs!

Lucy said...

My Dad just got us tons of extra channels (for the tv obviously) including the Disney Channel. Now I am just wondering how I got by without Hannah Monnana.

Larangutang said...

Good job in moving on and forgetting his birthday. I doubt I could do it since it was the same day we starting going out. But anyways, that corndog fryer is definitley unsexy and s'mores are one of the most amazing foods ever designed. :] love your blogs