My Government teacher is a sweet, sweet man, but he's sort of all over the place. He has stacks of graded homework in his classroom dating back to the Ice Age, or, like, 2003. Nearly every day he waddles in ten minutes late, fuming, and shows us last night's Fox News stories on an ancient TV, held together quite literally with duct tape. "Fair and balanced!" he preaches as if his life depends upon it. "Fair and balanced, unlike Nancy--Mrs.--Madam--Speaker... MADAM PELOSI." If you ask him, all the world's problems stem from Nancy Pelosi. But then again, if you ask him, Fox News is "fair and balanced."
Right now, we're working on what he refers to as a "Point Power Program." This translates loosely to "PowerPoint presentation." As much as I'd love to make slides about Affirmative Action, I received a lot of questions in my comments yesterday, so I thought I'd answer a few.
Partyweetow: "The only thing I can think of that comes in a plastic bag is, like, fruits and vegetables, and those are things you *should* be eating. "
Hayley: There's a girl in my class who always scoops ranch dressing out of a Ziploc baggy with a carrot. I can't think of anything grosser, save 2girls1cup.
Vena: "Are you thinking of going to Kenyon College? That's the one John Green went to."
Hayley: I've made my official decision to go to Ohio University in September, although, yes, John has yelled at me for not going to Kenyon. It's a really nice school, but it's not right for me.
Stefan: "Have you seen Spurlock's 30 Days show? It was okay. Though he is hardly a handsome man, but whatevs."
Hayley: I have, and I thoroughly disagree!
xOBrittxO: "You know, Jennifer Aniston doesn't dress girly and people still know she's a girl. And Ellen Page and Drew Barrymore and I'm sure there are tons more. You don't have to dress girly to be a girl."
Hayley: Haha. Thank you! I actually am kind of girly, though. My plan is more to remind myself to wake up early enough to put a tiny bit of effort into my appearance.
John: "Hayley, I assume you are going to major in English. Please tell me I'm right; otherwise it would be a travesty."
Hayley: Thanks! Yes, English is my first and most intense love. My whole life I was planning to major in Creative Writing, but lately I've been hearing a lot of negative sides to that idea. It's possible that I'll look into video editing of some sort, too. I love it, I think I'm pretty good at it, and I'd probably get to play with cool toys.
Kristi: "Thank you SO much for suggesting Sloppy Firsts the other day... I got it yesterday and can't stop reading! :)"
Hayley: I'M SO GLAD. You're welcome.
enchanted-lady7: "Hayley, you should know that you do not need to prove your femininity to people by painting your nails or putting on makeup. Just be yourself. Whether you're feminine or not, what's the big deal? I mean do men and women still need to abide to old stereotypes and customs so people can feel comfortable around us? Really, do not let other people's close-mindedness affect you. On another note, I was curious Hayley, how tall are you? :-P"
Hayley: Again, I appreciate your advice. :) But, as I said before, it's more about feeling more me than it is dressing to impress other people. As far as how tall I am, are you asking so you can figure out my body mass index and how many calories I need in a day? Sigh. I'm 5'5".
Kelly: "Well, you wouldn't wanna look like Sarah Jessica Parker anyway because she looks like a horse. Literally, there's even a website: www.sarahjessicaparkerlookslikeahorse.com"
Hayley: Awwww. I love Sarah Jessica Parker. That website is, admittedly, hilarious, but I still think she's beautiful.
Oh, while we're on the topic of dressing better to remind people I'm a girl... my best friend, Jess (I can't really explain her. I don't think anyone could) sometimes throws Theme Weeks, and currently it's Wear Ugly Clothes and Act Like They're Cute Week. I didn't participate Monday or yesterday, and she hit me. So right now I'm clad in a black skirt, vibrant primary blue tights, light blue and brown heels, a light blue shirt, giant white pearls and green and pink earrings. A few months ago, Jess wore nothing but chrome, and walked around saying "The-fut-ure-is-now" like a robot. Anytime someone mentions something happening after 2012, she laughs and informs them that the apocalypse is nigh. The characters in my life. Seriously.
Sexy: Slouching. This one came from Jess, but I totally agree with her. Looking bored is hot, whether we want to admit it or not.
Unsexy: Nose-blowing. Go to the bathroom to do that. Oh, oh, oh-- don't you dare put that tissue back in your pocket. It's not like you're going to want to use it again, and now you're just making the inside of your clothes mucus-y.
Chipotle burritos this year: 12
Subscribers: 15, 398
Days left of high school: 23
Bye, guys! See you tomorrow. <3