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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Twitter Downsizing

Last night, during the dinner table conversation about my crippling depression, my mother suggested that Twitter might play a role in my reclusive attitude. She says it's a way to feel like I'm being social, because I'm receiving two texts a minute about people's lives, but I'm not actually talking to anyone. My initial thought was, Okay, you would think that, but there's just such a huge generation gap that you don't understand. But upon later reflection, I decided to give her theory a chance. I've downsized my Twitter. Last night, I was following 130 people on the internet, and 40 on my phone. Now I'm following 99 in total, and 19 on my phone. Pssst. One of them is Miley Cyrus.

This is a lot harder than I thought it'd be! I first joined Twitter when it was fairly new, so I instantly followed anyone I knew at all or was remotely interested in. But now comes the time when I have to decided: do I care enough about Katy Perry to read her @replies? No. Do I care about the guy who writes PostSecret? Yes, but not enough to receive instant updates wherever I am. I took off the device updates for two of my friends last night before bed, and woke up flustered and upset with myself until I turned them back on. I think I have a problem.

Anyway, I'm going to the doctor's office at eleven to deal with the fact that I can't swallow painlessly. I'm going to place all the blame for this one on my friend, Sebastian... I hope I haven't infected Jess and TOLauren. Andrew's safe, because we don't actually spend any time near each other, and we certainly don't kiss. This is one rare time I'm grateful most of my friends live far away.

Sexy: Liam Neeson. Kicking ass, wearing kilts, grieving, holding babies: he's always going to be hot.
Unsexy: Having a throat that feels like a ribbed condom filled with acid.

Chipotle burritos this year: 21
Subscribers: 16,817

Bye, guys! Hopefully I'll see you tomorrow. <3

41 comments:

Anonymous said...

Get well soon! <3

Unknown said...

Why are you with Andrew?

Equatorgrim said...

Twitter makes me drool more than food.

Anyways, I hope you feel better.
=]

Afton said...

Get better soon! Good luck with downsizing, hopefully you don't do what I do. You know, start following them plus somewhere aroud 60 other people.

Equatorgrim said...

In my mind, your blogs are like the scripted version of a teen-drama television show.

The kind you thought was a reality show, until a friend tells you otherwise.

Unknown said...

Glad you've reinstated sexy/unsexy. I was beginning to miss it.

I empathise with your sore throat situation. Recovering from the flu means I know exactly how you feel =( Get well soon.

I may have obsessively and immediately checked to see if you're still following me. *ahem*

shea said...

I've downsized quite a bit on my youtube subs (you, as well as the other awesome girls, are still on the list) and it has been quite refreshing. Now, I have so much more time, and only watch the videos that I don't feel are wasting my time. I will get easier, BE STRONG! :)

Katy said...

Oh Twitter.

I always feel uncomfortable if I follow more than 70-ish people. Right now I'm at 74... I'm gonna have to go through and unfollow a few peeps soon.

... went ahead and did it. Now I'm following 68 people! There are probably around 20 from which I get mobile updates.

AAAAAAAAAAANYWAY, feel better <3 <3 <3

Faith said...

My dad made me quit twitter all at once- it gets easier, I promise. I still follow people, but not on my phone and I only go on twitter once every week or so. It honestly save a lot of time and money! (Less texting charges.)

I hope you feel better!

Gena. said...

Haha, I love your "Unsexy"
Ana that sucks.
Be... better.

Brad said...

Depression was around long before the digital age, trust me. I don't see what your internet/twitter addiction has to do with it. :P

Hope you feel better.

x0brittx0 said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9SArTdvSbY

that will cheer you up, i guarantee it or your money back.

i hope you feel better!!

Frenchie said...

A ribbed condom filled with acid...
That's an image that's going to stick...ew

Anyway, I'm so sorry you're sick! Get well soon!

Nicholas said...

Thanks very much for the condom image... *shudder*.

You have to control Twitter and not let it control you ;) but Twitter is an amazing tool and I wouldn't want to miss it. I received a reply from Imogen Heap a few days ago and I though "wOw" you can really talk to any famous person you want and they might listen :D

Melody said...

Yay, Hayley brought Sexy back!

...Wait...

...You know what I mean.

Anonymous said...

Its easy to throw around the word depression, please don't take this the wrong way, I don't know if you truly are suffering from depression or not. It just bugs me when people use it in passing as I have suffered twice from depression in my life (for various reasons.) Symptoms go much further than just sadness, and it leaves you unable to do normal day to day activities. I'm not talking procrastination, I used to having a feeling of helplessness (like stomach butterflies) and hopelessness all day which used to make me flit from task to task or just sit in a stunned haze. It also caused me to sleep walk (which I have never done before) and/or suffer from insomnia.
It's hard for the people around you too, having experienced it from both sides, its very draining for anyone trying to help.

...And ribbed condoms feel good. Ahaha.

Anonymous said...

Feel better! <3

realist. said...

Nice to see the return of the sexy/unsexy feature :)

Scott said...

I've done the same thing, both on twitter and youtube, but I find I still spend the same amount of time online. Now I'm addicted to blogs written by medical professionals. (Reserve comments. XD)

Get well soon. <3

Leah said...

I was about to harass you and ask if you were still following me on your phone, but then I remembered that a) you instantly replied to one of my tweets this morning, and b) you totally did the same thing to Kristina a few months back. Now it's like the world has come full circle!

Also, I will catch your mono-poisoning any day.

seurat2 said...

Downsizing twitter=good
sore throat(possibly mono)=bad
Hayley G. Hoover=awesome

That is all.

Anonymous said...

oh my God. I just did the same. IT FEELS SO GOOD.

Anonymous said...

(I'm still following Taylor Swift and Mandy Moore.)

Katrina said...

could be a thyroid thing.. the swallowing.

having a blackberry is making me feel like i'm being social because i have access to the web/aim everything.. but it's all a lie. a dirty lie!

Anonymous said...

Unsexy: Having a throat that feels like a ribbed condom filled with acid.

and right below that:
Trojan Ecstasy condoms advert.
haha

Gavin said...

That is most definately un-sexy... But at the same time a pretty damn hilarious way to describe a sore throat.
Get better soon, i'm sending you positive vibes to help get rid of the sickness.

Natalie said...

I deleted my twitter account and I feel like a better person without it.

Janet said...

Why are you and Andrew still together?

and ditto on the Twitter thing.
except for me...well you know
i havent had the balls to unfollow people. -.-' oh dear.

Chris. said...

'like a ribbed condom filled with acid'... ouch. hope you feel better soon! I've never really got into Twitter, but if Hayleyghoover is this into it, then maybe i should. And just a question ; What would you do if Andrew found your blog?

Shawna said...

Today I spent ages catching up on your blog, and I saw that you plugged my newest video. That was unnecessarily generous of you, and I was floored - thank you. All in all, my brain has been thoroughly Hayleyfied.

I know you'll snort at this "I wish my life was as exciting/interesting as yours!" comment, but I genuinely mean it. And I really, really, really need to STOP WANTING TO BE PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET and you are facilitating my problem to such an outstanding degree that I have NOT MOVED FOR HOURS! That said, I kind of like you, Hayley. So I wrote you a juvenile verse.

"Boys are dumb
And adults too,
I'll spend my day
In web with you."

[You can not possibly comprehend how difficult it is for me to post this comment without sticking a 'z' on the end of 'web'. Resist!]

Kiera Jo said...

Woohoo! I just finally finished catching up on your blog, which means I don't feel like a complete idiot leaving a comment. Hopefully I will comment more often now...

I understand this whole twitter problem. I have turned off device updates on a lot of people, but I still receive a ton of twitter texts every day--and I can't bring myself to turn the entire thing off...it's bad! And yet, when people ask me about twitter and I begin explaining it to them, I'm struck by how truly pointless it is for the most part.

Twitter: a great paradox of our time.

Allison said...

With the mention of your throat feeling like a ribbed condom filled with acid, I just noticed that a Trojan ad appeared. You've had everything from male bras to condoms for your adsense LOL.

Read your twitter; glad to hear you don't have mono. (:

As for twitter... yeah. I'm kinda latching onto it. I wasn't too bad before, but since they had the next to normal twitter performance (show i really want to see - the ability to see it + a twitter performance x epicness = <3) I've run into a habit of checking it bihourly. Your tweets amuse me.

FEEL BETTER <3

A.J. James said...

A ribbed condom filled with Acid.... some times you say the darndest things... hope you get better... I only follow 44 on twitter and I think maybe 15 of those are on mobile updates. (miss Horner and yourself included) When I started twitter the few people that i did follow were all tweeting whores, and they still are the group may seem small but they keep me entertained...

Sarahalala said...

Gotta love super personal dinnertime conversations...

I hope you feel better soon, Hayley!

And I'm glad to hear that you don't have mono.

Maya said...

Psst. You're the only one I follow on my phone.
(:

(Besides MuggleCast, of course.)

VicMorrowsGhost said...

"Having a throat that feels like a ribbed condom filled with acid."

Frickbang! Just woke up, was so incredibly not ready for such a... visceral description.

This is why I read you, personal, thoughtful discussion about life and then... humourstab! I want to say, you're the bull in the china shop of my mind. It's not entirely fitting but I still wanted to say it.

Peter said...

This has hardly anything to do with this particular post, but is a response to the blog as a whole.

Gah, you suck. And by that I mean, you are addictive and it makes me mad. I'm a big fan of your videos, and I decided to check out your blog. I figured I'd just give it a look see for a few minutes. Of course that's not what happened. I was instead enticed to read every friggen post you've written.

I feel sorta...guilty or something to have spent so much time in someone else's life. Someone whom, I don't actually know, and doesn't know I exist at all. It just feels really creepy/lame on my part. Maybe it's not so bad. It seems like the internet encourages these weird one way stalkeresque relationships. And you're voluntarily offering all the information, so I guess I shouldn't feel creepy. It just doesn't feel right to be this into someone else's life. I'll get over it.

Thanks for being awesome and entertaining.

Erin said...

That whole concept of Twitter making you feel like you're acting more social than you really are makes a lot of sense.

Freya said...

Feel better soon.

Hayley far be it from me to tell you how to live your life, but you need to sort out the Andrew thinkg, its unfair to the both of you to continue, dont you think?

Ohhh Twitter, cant live with it, cant live without it.

Nokorola said...

:-( Feel better soon Hayley.

Lucky Andrew.

and once again I hope you feel better soon Hayley.

Olivia said...

I miss when you Blogged Every Day April. :(