Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Bouncy Houses

For the annual Memorial Day party that The Situation's family throws, his parents rented one of those big inflatable bouncy houses for the kids to play in. They were thrilled by it, obviously-- a giant castle that you can throw yourself into without getting hurt or in trouble!-- and the kids jumped their little hearts out.

For about fifteen minutes, before they got bored and went inside to play video games.

And even though I was far from athletic as a child, and would have given anything to get out of kickball or gym class, seeing that unoccupied blow-up castle depressed me. It was so exciting! And so safe! And so available! Why avoid it?

This week, my blog has felt like the bouncy house. The Hayleylujah Chorus is like a mystical candyland where everybody gets along and is happy to see me and thinks I'm funny even when I'm boring and stupid, but I, inexplicably, just haven't been feeling up for a bounce. It's not for lack of stories to tell you, because I've been staying at The Situation's house for a week now, and we've done a whole slew of fun things, from going on cutesy dates to walking around the zoo. And it's not for lack of time, because I'm halfway through rereading The Catcher in the Rye, and about to start Jaclyn Moriarty's new book, The Ghosts of Ashbury High. There's no real excuse for not checking in with you guys. As sad as it is, I guess video games will sometimes beat bouncy houses. And in this case, The Situation is a Wii.

But enough of that! I'm here! I like being here! I don't mean to sound like it's a great hassle for me to grace you with my divine presence four times a month. You guys are the coolest people in all of the internet, and even when I don't feel so much like spewing my soul into print, I do miss you. What's up in your lives? What have you eaten today? How 'bout that soccer game, huh?*

Right now, I'm on The Situation's bed, typing with one hand and carelessly banging a drumstick on his pillow with the other. He's off elsewhere in the house, recording himself singing. His sister just walked past and touched a key on the piano in the hallway. I hear clanging noises coming from the kitchen, which means there must be food. For this, I am extremely pumped. Along with being utterly wonderful in general, The Situation's parents also have this fabulous habit of providing me with delicious meals. It's like staying in a hotel where everyone is funny and good-looking and feeding me. I feel like Little Orphan Annie.

However, if there is a downside to spending every second with my ridiculously entertaining and sweet boyfriend, it's that we have very different eating schedules. He likes to have breakfast at noon, lunch at three, dinner at eight, and a meal before bed. I start eating as soon as I wake up, and don't like to stop until I'm falling asleep with food dangling from my open mouth. I'm big on salads, and he refuses to eat vegetables unless they're deep fried or deeply hidden amongst cheese and bread and meat. I can deal with this, though, because he looks like a Disney prince. MY LIFE IS SO HARD.

Okay, on that note, my stomach is telling me (quite noisily, I might add) to get off my butt and go fill it with nourishment. I hope you're all having a lovely first week of summer (or winter, for those of you down under). Our group mission for the day (because I apparently give out missions now) is to find one of the metaphorical blow-up castles in our lives and go for a bounce, while we still can. Happy jumping!

Chipotle burritos this year: 19
Subscribers: 29,751
Nail color: Chipped and not so hot

*You can comment about soccer if you must, but I'm sorry for misleading you; I do not care about soccer.


Alessandra said...

It's OK, Hayley, it's not like we sit in front of our computers, waiting mournfully for you to post... well, maybe I do, but most people don't :)

On another note, The Ghosts of Ashbury High is AMAZING. Jaclyn Moriarty is a genius. And from Australia.


Zombie said...

When I first read the title of this post I thought it said "Bouncy Horses" which made me think of that My Little Pony Live video you showed us a while back. I shivered.

Phoenix said...

When I saw the title, I honestly thought you were using some nickname for mental institutions. Here, we call "Bouncy Houses" "Spacewalks." Crazy.

Your life sounds so blissful right now, I almost don't mind you not posting. Almost. :)

Rosanna said...

Your blog posts really do make my day :) and I appreciate the little link to 'Annie', it has been years since I watched that movie!

Kai said...

I was at a party with a bouncy house on monday!
It was even a princess bouncy house, decorated with disney princesses on it, and a balcony that you can't actually go in.

Hailey said...

My bouncy house is my theater camp that starts Monday! I'm so excited! I hope you and the Lombardo pack are having good time :D

Hailey said...

I think you gave me your apocalyptic cough. Through the internet...

Anonymous said...

My metephorical bouncy house, i still write my best friend a letter every day because she lives in a different state. Dispite cell phones and IM and all that stuff nothing compares to writing an honest letter.

Melody said...

Once when I was bouncing in a bounce house at my church, some hooligan came along and unplugged the... air... fan... thing... so the bounce house sort of deflated and started to collapse. The other children and I thought it was hilarious even though we all could've suffocated and died. #unrelatedstorytime
#usinghashtagsoutsideoftwitter #whatiswrongwithme

Glad you're having such fun with the Situation and his fam! Your blog has made me hungry now too. :)

Beach Girl said...

At long last a new blog post! Shouldn't you be blogging every day now that you're out of school? Situation or not, your readers deserve to be graced and entertained by your presence.

partyweetow said...

He DOES look like a Disney prince!

Anonymous said...


One time I went to get community service hours at my friend's church with a group of friends. There were 2 bounce houses filled with hyper active 10 year olds we had to look after. All my friends went to one, which left me stranded at the other because at least one person had to monitor the bounce house. Need less to say, it was horrible. And I didn't even get to go inside unless it was to pull some crying kid out of the bounce house :( Sad times.


Dana said...

Your posts honestly make my day. :)
I know you probably don't care too much, but since you asked, my life is perdy awesome right now. Seven hours of horse camp for a month. I love it. And I started the Jessica Darling series after my best friend in the whole world most amazing person ever finished it. We're a little scared that Megan McCafferty has kind of...stolen our thoughts. :)

And bouncy houses are awesomesauce.

Lindsey said...

You life has much, much more win than mine. I just started my new job today, a job that involves mainly standing at a cash register for hours at a time and panicking every time someone needs to exchange something. (It's a *complicated* process!)

My bouncy house (if I understand the metaphor, which I'm not sure I do) is Infinitus!

Chelsea said...

yay for hayleyposts : ) My summer plans, you ask? Oh, how thoughtful of you! Well since you asked ; ) I graduate on Friday, which is a relief. I feel like I'm stuck in limbo because I've been off school for nearly two weeks (NY state has regents exams and I didn't take any regents classes this year so NO SCHOOL FOR ME!) but my mom has been working and my dad has been busy, so I've been home being bored. And it's not like I don't have stuff to do- my mother keeps nagging me to clean for all the family that's coming (like, a whopping four people?) but I'm exhausted.

Later in the summer, I'm doing a writing workshop that my AP English teacher is running. And that should be fun, and by fun I mean awkward and interesting and not exactly how I'd like to spend a week of my summer. Oh well.

At some point I'm getting a MacBook. And a new phone. Yay technology.

Oh dear, what else? Graduation parties, days at the lake, random adventures driving around the city with my friends- theses are all things to come, I'm sure. I'll have to keep looking for that bouncy castle though...

Thanks for listening ; ) Keep living your fabulous life, being happy is the most fulfilling thing in the world. I can understand totally why you don't blog every second of your life.

Sara said...

Hayley, I just... I love your writing. You manage to turn a simple blogpost about how you haven't been posting lately because you've been hanging out with your boyfriend into a metaphor about bouncy castles. That's why I love reading your blog. Some people's blogs are just anecdotes, but yours manages to be great writing as well. Even with a simple metaphor, you turn it into something more than JUST a blogpost, and I think that's pretty awesome.

Abbie said...

I DID NOT KNOW JACLYN MORIARTY HAD A NEW BOOK OUT!!! Obviously, I kind of suck at life. But I looooove her. Sheesh. And I was just at Barnes & Noble today.

It's cool that you're having such a good time at The Situation's house with his family. It does sound ridiculously like Annie. Is his dad bald and commanding? And does his mom tap dance extremely well??? And do they have a dog named Sandy?!? Because that would blow my mind.

Well, have a great rest of your visit. Hopefully you decide to hell with everything else, bouncey houses rock and come back to updating semi-frequently!

Samantha said... Jaclyn Moriarty book? Excellent, I will most def check it out! I read The Year Of Secret Assignments last year, and then just re-read it last week. Love.

Glad you are having such a great time with The Situation. (Hope he wins the John Mayer thing fyi).

See ya later!

Mia said...

Bouncy bouncy, ooh such a good time.
Bouncy bouncy, shoes all in a line.
Bouncy bouncy,everybody summersault.
Everybody sing along!
Bouncy bouncy, ooh such a good time.
Bouncy bouncy, white socks slipping down.
Bouncy bouncy, Stilettos are a no no.
Bouncy bouncy oh!
Bouncy bouncy oh!
Every time I bounce I feel I could touch the skyeeeeee.


Stephanie Vecellio said...

So...since you're staying with The Situation, will you be at the Connecticut show on Friday? I'd love to meet you!

Kristen said...

Thanks for the reminder Hayley! My 'bounce house' would have to be remembering to take pictures. I haven't taken a single one since March when I went on a trip to Florida. Also, it's summer and I haven't gone on any decent walks yet. However, I have finally (and at my age somewhat depressing) started reading Harry Potter. Started on Sunday and I only have a little bit of "Chamber of Secrets" left, so yeah, only a little bit addictive. So now it seems I'm finally understanding what you guys have been excited about for so long. Sounds like you are having a lovely time and enjoy the food, sounds delightful!

Larry said...

Summary of World Cup:

Emily said...

Uh, okay. Now I seriously want to go jump in a bouncy castle. Did you jump in the bouncy castle when the children got bored of it? Please tell me you jumped in the bouncy castle!

Natalie said...

Guess what? My summer job is working on one of those bouncy houses. There's a slide too, it's great, and me and my friends get to go on it when we let it down :)
Glad you blogged, Hayley!

toastburntbread said...

You made me have to exhale a bit when you said Jaclyn Moriarty wrote a new book.

Immediately after I read this, I went on amazon and searched it.

I'm a tad freaking out because I'm so excited!

Ukulelly said...

Hayley, I laughed very very loudly at your description of your food schedule. I am in a car with the windows wide open at the side of the main road, waiting for my mother to finish being in the post office. I startled a chihuawa quite violently, and I hope you are ready to take the blame for any trauma this puppy may have suffered.

Next time, please think before you write, think of the startled puppies.

VTBurninator said...

"I've never even picked up a racket!"

Annie references aside, I'm glad you graced us with your presence, it makes my Thursday morning brighter (and gives me something to do other than work...blah!) Now on to your probing questions:

What's up in your lives? Well a lot actually! Since I've commented last, my gf and I have hired a personal trainer which has resulted in legs so sore I cannot climb stairs nor sit on the toilet without the aid of a metal bar. I danced the night away at a fabulous gay night club, saw a sea turtle laying her eggs, went to Chicago for the first time and ate delicious Chicago pizza, got trapped in Chicago due to the Spirit pilot strike, oh yeah and I went to this new theme park you might've heard of....Wizarding World of Harry Potter!!! that!

What have you eaten today? A Starbucks Power Protein Plate consisting of a bagel with peanut butter, apples, cheese, a hardboiled egg and grapes, washed down with a thirst quenching shaken green tea.

How 'bout that soccer game, huh? Goooooo USA! I'm not a huge soccer fan, but I love international sports competitions. I think it helps people remember about all those other countries in the world, I hope I'm not the only one that was like, "Where is Slovenia, again?"

And on that note...I'm outtie!! Thinking about reading these Jaclyn Moriarty books you speak so highly about...any advice on where to start??

Tikva said...

metaphorical bouncy house? I think mine would probly be outside while I am in here posting a coment on your blog...
your cool and you are actually funny even when your boring so deal with it. <3 :D

BenCracknell said...

You should have bounced your little heart out on that bouncy castle. I'm only 15, and every time I see one I jump for my life. They will never, ever get old.

It sounds like you're having a lot of fun, and The Situation's family sound so adorable!

Have a great day!

Marie said...

Not only am I happy to have read a new blog entry from you, I am also happen to be informed that The Ghosts of Ashbury High is out. I haven't been tracking authors/books much lately...

Anyway, I wish I could find one of those bouncy things! But I think if I fell in one, I wouldn't be able to get back up =P

My life is somewhat boring at present, just sitting in the store where my mom works so I can use the interwebz. However, I'm going to visit my friend soon at her new house in Albany and I'm going to Infinitus, so at least I have things to look forward to. In addition to more blog entries from you, of course!

Kelly said...

Hayley, as always, I am totally grateful for whatever little bits of yourself that you're willing to share.

Thanks for the inspiration. It was just what I needed.

MemoriesofBugjuice said...

Hayley, I love your blog. Keep cashing in those metaphors and similes!

raindropsonroses said...

yeah, in the UK we call them bouncy castles. :D Thanks for writing this blog Hayley, you are awesome. :)

Azu said...

You defining The Situation's house and his parents reminded me of Harry while in the Burrow, being fed constantly and feeling incredibly happy all the time.

Just saying.

Oh, and in reference of your last video, you should play videogames. Not like zombie-shooting videogames, but videogames you like. There's so much variety, you've got to like something. :)

Bel said...

It's always good hearing from you, Hayley.
Looks like you're having an amazing time with Mike - which makes us readers very happy.
Today was my last day of class at college - going to my 4th semester out of 10. Pretty exciting. Also, I was elected chief-editor of my college's independent magazine, which, also, is very exciting.
I haven't eaten nearly anything today, which makes me feel a little empty. On the other hand, I'm baking cupcakes to make up for it ; )

Katie? said...

-an everything bagel
-iced coffee
-a granola bar (chocolate chunk)
-an apple-
-a cheeseburger!
-some peanuts
-and a piece of gum that has now lost all flavor:(

Pip said...

I love a Hayley update but I realize that sometimes real life is so fun you don't want to stop for a minute to blog. But when you do update it makes my day. Metaphorical bouncy house...adorable and so true! i love your commentary on life.

As for what has been going on with my life, since you asked I thought I'd share that today I got to meet John Green and David Levithan.

Anonymous said...

My bouncy house is reading new books! Thanks for the blog post they are always fun to read and they make me happy. I aspire to be like you when I get to college. I want to be fun, happy, confident, and have a real love of life and adventure. You make me excited for school. Thanks :]


Anthea said...

I've been playing in the pit orchestra for a community theater production of Annie for the last week. It was nice to see it and not be playing underneath the stage for once! :)

alylurker said...

Umm I jumped on a trampoline...does that count?
They actually have a bouncy house at the fair that is currently in town, and I'm considering going...except that would mean missing my friend's graduation party so I'm not sure I can accept this mission.
ALSO, your blog part about going on a bouncy house while we still can reminded me very much of Catcher in the Rye! Thought I would share since you said you were rereading it xD

Sidsel said...

NOW I don't care about soccer either, because the Danish team is out as of yesterday.

I really like your metaphor.

That bloggers blog said...

i feel we as bloggers dont do soccer matches we do however spend 7 hours road tripping it to an E.B games distribution office so your cousin can guard it and yep it is winter also jumping castles are awesome fun ^^^^^^australian term for bouncy house

Hayley M said...

I get it: you're happy, so you don't blog so much. Blogging about being happy just takes up time that you could be using to do happy, fun stuff. It works the same with journals. We like it when you're happy! Don't worry!
Also, whaaat soccer game?? (stares blankly)

Lindsay said...

So, I am the Lindsay that saw you at the Hamden Nerdfest show and gushed about how much I loved your blog. I just wanted to stop by and say thank you for being just as awesome in person as you are on your blog/videos. You truly are an inspiration, Hayley. :) <3

Suburban Sweetheart said...

Prince Eric-like looks are worth some food hassle.

Anonymous said...

That second to last paragraph made me lol irl.

beangirl1389 said...

I'm reading Catcher in the Rye right now too! Also, check your PO Box. =)

Jonneke said...

It's only extremely understandable that you want to spend all the time you have on your "Wii". So, go have fun with that! And bouncy castles are classic, which basically means they'll always be there - and so will we!

Be happy and enjoy being with Mike! :D

Kaylin Smite said...

Hayley,everytime I see that you have made a new video or posted a new blog post type thing (noy sure what to call it) I get all excited. Lol, I am weirdo. But I just LOVE your personality and the way you see things and etc. You are GREAT.
What's new with me? Well, I gotz me a new phone which makes me HAPPY! :D
Well, enough with my babbiling, haha :)
Have a lovely summer!

eibbore said...


I hope you are having a fabulous time, and that you had fun with some of the other 5AG on their tour.

Life is good, can't wait for vacation. I didn't eat as much as usual today, which I suppose is good. Or maybe bad because I ate it all in one meal instead of throughout the day. Why did I just write that??

Should stop before I continue onto ridiculous tangents concerning pokemon and muffins... or something

Nour said...

So several months ago I stumbled upon fiveawesomegirls and started watching the videos. This past weekend I started reading your blog.
Considering I just graduated and yet to have a job I had to start at the beginning of course. (I am currently on August of 2009. Is this slightly stalkerish/creepy? I hope not.)
I just wanted to say I love your blog! It is really great to read. Also, I must say we have a lot in common (love for food, Harry Potter, and so on).
I know this is really random, but I just wanted to say hi and to say I think you are awesome.

Cat (: said...

hey you.

your bouncy house misses you. (:

Lauren said...

I went on my first date tonight! That is the most exciting thing in my life right now.

kira902k said...

Your boyfriend is a Disney prince. I love your life.
Hahah. That's weird to say, maybe.
I do miss when you don't blog though.
But I understand how video games can sometimes just be EASIER to devote time to than Bouncy Castles.


Caroline said...

TOTALLY RANDOM: I know you like Teen Witch and so do I. As I was watching videos of Teen Witch on YouTube today, this video popped up.

I can't believe they would remake it with Ashley Tisdale. tisk tisk

Anonymous said...

How did you and the situation meet and become boyfriend and girlfriend

Anonymous said...

Dearest, Darlingest Hayley 'Gangster' Hoover,

I miss your posts. Please give me something witty to read instead of AP Us History 2 summer work, AP Environmental summer work, and honors La summer work. Pwease? :(

A Fan

Anonymous said...

Almost a month. Just pointing it out. =(

Anonymous said...

Haley, if I were you, I'd be doing exactly what you're doing: hanging out with Mike and ignoring the blog.

Seriously, I'm a straight guy and would consider going gay for him.

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Hrm, hrm...
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